Posted by: birdmaddgirl | 17 November 2012

ritual

one of the ways i notice myself getting older is a greater desire for ritual and routine. generally, i don’t have a lot of structure to my life. as a part-time student and a single person, i get more leeway.

travel pulls me out of what routine i do have, and i’ve had plenty of travel over the past month. i’ve lost hold of the routines i established during and after my cleanse (although i’m trying to reintegrate). i’ve lost my regular yoga practice schedule too. what i don’t feel i have any real grip on is my own relationship to ritual behavior. it’s a gap.

i don’t have any writing rituals. i don’t have set events (or non-events). i don’t even have a strong relationship to celebrations and holidays (most of which i feel deeply conflicted about – new year’s might be the least problematic). i’m thinking about how ritual becomes more incorporated in my life, how i participate more fully in cyclical time. i can understand how ritual is important, how it integrates, how it allows time to exist. but as someone who grew up outside of religious traditions and without any strong community ties (besides the ones i’ve made haphazardly myself), i don’t see where i fit. it seems to me like establishing some semblance of routine is a stepping stone to ritual. it seems like ritual should feel so much closer than it does. half-baked thoughts.

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